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Stop Telling Your Inner Critic to Shut Up

Updated: Jun 6, 2022

I see posts all over social media and hear people talk about how they engage with their "inner critic". ⁠When dealing with the inner critic, we're traditionally told to do a couple things...

  • push it away & flip the script, OR

  • battle it and tell it to shut up

But after a while, don't you just get tired of the fight? What if there was another way to tame your inner critic in a non-judgement and peaceful way? Let's look at your inner critic from a different angle. Just a heads up that this can be hard to do at the beginning, because it requires the part of us that has battled the inner critic for so long to soften back a bit, so that curiosity and self-compassion can increase.⁠

What if your "inner critic" is an aspect of your personality that is trying to protect you... actually trying to protect a deeper, wounded part of you? When wounds or traumas happen, internal defensive mechanisms automatically respond in our brains and nervous systems. When it comes to the inner critic, the wound is typically rooted in childhood in the form of an external, shaming voice of a caregiver.

So at some point in life, instead of receiving the criticism, shame and rejection from an outside source, a protective response rises up in us. Because if we criticize ourselves first, then others won't have a chance to.

I'm trained in a form of psychotherapy called IFS. Within IFS, the protective response of the inner critic is there to proactively "manage" us, in order to keep us safe. That response also plays the role of protecting a deeper, "exiled" wound within.

What do we do about this? Instead of berating your inner critic, take steps to befriend it.

Healing then looks like this...

  • Understanding the protective role of your inner critic

  • Healing the deeper wounded part of you that your inner critic is trying to protect

  • Releasing stored tension and physical responses within the nervous system related to inner criticism

  • Releasing burdens & limiting beliefs and receiving freedom & truth

How do you interact with your "inner critic"? More importantly, how is that going for you?

If you're ready to experience another way to gently release your inner critic and transform that criticizing voice into your inner cheerleader, schedule a Discovery Call with me HERE, where we'll discuss the steps you can take to exchange the deep inner turmoil and tension you're experiencing for presence, purpose, and peace.

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